Monday, April 30, 2007

SEVEN KIDS DO A CRAZY HOUSE MAKE

On Friday Rachel had Civies day at school where they pay €2 to the Schools nominated charity and get to wear normal clothes for the day instead of their usual uniform. She said she was going to get the bus straight after school, to 'Liberty Spike's' house where she was going to sleep over with some other friends so they could have band practice in the morning. This statement loosely translates out of The Mother Tongue into The Teenage Vernacular of;
' I am going to stay somewhere very far away from you so I can smoke hash, cigarettes and drink anything with proof that needs proof to be bought before I engage in full sexual intercourse with either a male or female, get pregnant with twins making you a grandmother and be moved straight to the top of the Council Housing List.'
And so at 4.00pm I was surprised to hear her call my name as she walked down the hall and into the kitchen.

But wait..was that her? Every colour of the rainbow was sprayed in her hair, on her face and clothes and all over her new Quicksilver backpack. There was white paint all over her clothes down the left side of her body.
" Somebody pushed me into a freshly painted wall" she smiled, which translates into "I've got friends and I'm popular."

"Where exactly was this wall, Balamory? Did you hit it head first ?"
I must say moving to this new house and school in this one street town suits her. I haven't seen her look so happy in ages.

On Saturday night I tucked the bed clothes around Sarah and Audrey when I noticed Audrey crying.
''What's wrong love?''
''I don't want to grow up Mummy because if I grow up then you'll get older too and die? How can I make myself stop growing so you won't die?"
I went away to contemplate that one because it seems like she could have something there.

On Sunday I added three more kids to my four and spent the evening washing WAX DAX out of failed Mohawks and driving around looking for five of them who went awol between Extra Vision and my house at 10pm.

Rachel appeared at 7.00pm with a friend who's staying the week because her Mother's abroad setting up a Property Development Company. She spent half an hour explaining to me, with an excited tone and flushed face, her plans for a national tour around Dublin, Limerick, Cork, Galway and back to Dublin with her band and two other support bands.
'That's my girl, aim high, aim high.' I thought, thinking back to the time I unsuccessfully sold Lines for The Blind outside Quinnsworth Supermarket to earn a few quid at the same age when I heard the words Public Liability Insurance, Bouncers, Sleep on the Bus, Profit, Loss, Turnover issue forth from her mouth. What 15 year old knows about Public Liability for CHRISTSAKES.

They say, tread carefully for you tread on my dreams and from experience I know not to argue about things like this because 99% of the time it comes to nothing. Right, doesn't it???????

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