Friday, November 23, 2007

LETTER TO RACHEL 15YRS OLD

Dear Rachel,

These past two weeks you've been behaving a little below your low low standard of consideration for the other five people living with you here in this house.

' What is she talking about' I'm guessing you're saying to yourself by the time you've read this far, and since I am aware that at 15 years of age your brain has not yet matured enough to guess, here's a few clues............

THIS IS NOT A HOTEL.

YOUR ROOMS A TIP

PICK UP AFTER YOURSELF

FEED THE DOG

TURN OFF YOUR BEDROOM LIGHT

DO NOT GO OUT MID WEEK NIGHTS

TURN OFF THE WATER PUMP AFTER YOU USE IT

BUY YOUR FAMILY MEMBER BIRTHDAY PRESENTS.

BE HOME WEEKEND NIGHTS BY 10.30PM

DO NOT SMOKE OUT YOUR EN-SUITE WINDOW

DO NOT SMOKE PERIOD.

DO NOT TEXT ON YOUR MOBILE PHONE DURING MEALTIMES

DO NOT TEXT WHILE I AM EXPLAINING SOMETHING TO YOU

DO NOT GO ONLINE WHILE WATCHING THE KIDS DURING THE DAY

DO NOT GO ONLINE MIDWEEK

ONLY ONE SLEEP-OVER PER WEEKEND AND THAT ONCE INCLUDES HAVING FRIENDS SLEEP HERE.

UNDERSTAND THAT THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES FOR YOUR INABILITY TO UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THE WORD CONSEQUENCE

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...........

NEVER EVER CALL YOUR MOTHER A SPA AGAIN.

Love Mum

2 comments:

karen harper said...

Hey Ellen,
You are still hilarious!
I am opeing a gallery before Christmas in Dunlaoire....do any of your pictures want to come and join us??
Karen Harper

jothemama said...

Did she make the 'spa' face? you know the one, when you push your tongue against your lower lip?

Dangerous ground....

10.30 weekend nights is early though!